First Few Days
From the moment the physician told me that my husband didn't make it, I went numb. Nothing was real to me. I had no concept
of how to proceed and what was expected of me. I left the hospital emergency room with a friend. As soon as I got home, I
began the hardest phones calls I will ever make. I had to contact our children and let them know their father had just passed
away. For support, I called a real close friend and she immediately came to my house to help me with the details. She stayed
for several days. I will always be grateful for her friendship and support.
Before I left the hospital, I gave the nurses the name of the nearest funeral home. Later that evening, the funeral director
called me to let me know that my husband had arrived and to offer their condolences. The next day, I called them, when I
was ready and sat up an appointment for later in the afternoon to make the arrangements. They helped me to make the arrangements
that I was comfortable with. I was lucky. My husband's family already had a family plot in one of the local cemetaries.
My brother-in-law gave up his spot to me so I would know that I always will have a place next to my husband. Our minister
was willing to provide the service for my husband. The arrangements were completed.
The Day of the Funeral
This was the most unreal day of my life. I snuck out of the house and spent some time with my husband, alone at the funeral
home. When it was time for the funeral, I had the hardest time leaving him. I had to take that final walk down the aisle,
while they closed the casket. I felt as if my own life was ending. The service was really wonderful but I really don't remember
much. At the grave side, the weather was beautiful. Up in the sky, the clouds were in the form of an anchor. I will never
know for sure, it if was to symbolize my husband's years of service in the US Navy or our youngest child's new adventures
of following his father's foot steps. I was in pain. I knew what was gonna happen to the love of my life. He was being put
in the ground. This was not real.